Fantasy Racism

April 16, 2009

I hate elves, I really do. I don’t know why, it’s irrational, and I even kind of like pointy ears. But elves with their emo whininess (in almost every incarnation) just depress me!  Trying to think of one I like… but I really can’t. Maybe Arwen and Elrond, a little, but that’s the closest I get. And even that is begrudging (I know now that someone will find one in the Silmarillion I can get behind, but a few exceptions to prove the rule!)

Sorry, just had to get that off my chest. I guess I’m a racist when it comes to my fantasy races…



  1. 100% agree..though it’s not that they make me depressed, but angry 😉

    Maybe 15 years of playing dwarves in RPG’s is one reason for this,maybe it’s just.. elves are so..worthy objects of hate 😉

  2. Me TOO. Let’s form a club.

  3. Tolkien’s elves are badasses, they’re just not portrayed that way by anyone but him. I used to have a huge cob on because D&D elves were more akin to fricken fairies (4′ high and slight or some such BS instead of 6’6″ and kick-ass as they are in LOTR) than to “real” elves.

    The whole emo thing is a sad and cheap substitute for what Tolkien (and a few others) really wanted to explore, which is the nostalgia for a golden age, the idea that the world has sort of been getting less and less wonder-full since it was created (specifically, less and less magical) — which is a staple of almost all RL myths and therefore of fantasy. Sad thing is, most fantasy authors (or game makers) have no real understanding of nostalgia and yearning and just turn it into sad sappy people in robes whining about how great they used to be.

    Bah humbug! 😀

  4. Drizz’tt is badass. Drow in general are pretty good, but like you not too excited by the pretty elves. I like WoW’s pastiche of them as Valley Girls (listen to the female blood elf jokes and flirts), seemed bang on the money.

  5. I agree with Ysharros. The elves in the Silmarillion kick some serious ass. Any other conception of elves is akin to substituting burly dwarves for garden gnomes.

  6. […] Arbitrary and Zizlak are on board with me for this whole hating-elves thing, and I agree with them — we […]

  7. […] post on Fantasy Racism could be the start of a new movement. Well..maybe not new, but some sort of unification process […]

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